Feeding the Mouth That Bites You

Parenting Teenagers Is Hard. How Do You Know If You’re Doing It Right?

Many parents struggle in raising their teens because they fail to transition from seeing them as children to seeing them as adults-in-training. Progressively giving teens more control over their lives reduces stress and prepares your teen for maturity as an adult.

In Feeding the Mouth that Bites You, Dr. Ken Wilgus outlines a clear path to help parent teens in today’s world. Engaging, accessible, and based on Dr. Wilgus’ thirty-five years of clinical family work, teaching on parenting―and successfully raising three teens of his own―you’ll find this guide immensely practical. Learn what your teen needs and why they act the way they do so that you can reduce your frustrations and thoughtfully guide them. You’ll also discover how to help them to grow in responsibility and prepare them to launch into the real world; reduce conflict and maintain good communications; set clear, reasonable limits without provoking fights; and manage tough issues like school, alcohol use, dating, etc., and more!

1. Opening Credits
2. Dedication
3. Foreword
4. Part 1: We Created This Mess
5. Chapter 1: A Revolution in Parenting Teenagers
6. Chapter 2: The Inventon of Teenagers
7. Chapter 3: The Burden of Parenting
8. Chapter 4: What Adolescents Need and Why They Act This Way
9. Part 2: Planned Emancipation
10. Chapter 5: Understanding Planned Emancipation
11. Chapter 6: Implementing Planned Emancipation
12. Chapter 7: The Endpoint of Planned Emancipation
13. Chapter 8: When Planned Emancipation Doesn't Work
14. Part 3: Harnessing the Power of Planned Emancipation
15. Chapter 9: The Priority and Problems in Communication with Teenagers
16. Chapter 10: Tools for Effective Communication with Teenagers
17. Chapter 11: Limit Setting with Adolescents
18. Chapter 12: Implementing Limits: The Expectations and Consequences List
19. Part 4: Planned Emancipation and Adolescent Life Activities
20. Chapter 13: School
21. Chapter 14: Sports and Other Extracurricular Activities
22. Chapter 15: Friendship and Group Activities
23. Chapter 16: Dating and Sex
24. Part 5: "But What About. . . ?"
25. Chapter 17: Fear and Planned Emancipation
26. Chapter 18: Smartphones and Other Portable Screens
27. Chapter 19: Social Media
28. Chapter 20: Video Games
29. Chapter 21: The Shame-Based Power of Pornography
30. Chapter 22: Alcohol and Other Intoxicants
31. Part 6: The Inner Lives of Teenagers
32. Chapter 23: Pros and Cons of Self-Awareness
33. Chapter 24: Anxiety and Depression
34. Chapter 25: ADHD and Autism Spectrum Issues
35. Chapter 26: Brain Science, Trauma, and Other Rabbit Holes
36. Chapter 27: Sexuality and Gender Identity
37. Chapter 28: Influencing an Adolescent's Faith
38. Part 7: Let's Talk about You
39. Chapter 29: The Fire and the Knife: Lessons from Father Abraham
40. Chapter 30: Marriage and Parenting
41. Chapter 31: Single Parenting
42. Chapter 32: Divorce and Blended Families
43. Chapter 33: Adoption, Foster Care, and Teenagers
44. Part 8: After You're Done
45. Chapter 34: Adult Children Living at Home
46. Chapter 35: Teenagers and Grandparents
47. Appendices
48. Appendix 1: Freedoms List Examples
49. Appendix 2: Examples of and Issues with an Expectations and Consequences List
50. Appendix 3: Starting Planned Emancipation in Your Home
51. Closing Credits